I am a dreamer. I am not a dreamer who knows how to make her dreams into reality most of the time. I am the type of dreamer who wastes tons of time thinking and planning and looking on-line and researching dreams I have but who doesn’t have the resources to ever make these a reality nor do I actually do the actual research needed to fulfill one of my dreams. I am a simple dreamer with no way to really attain those dreams at this point in my life.
I am 60 years old. My life has been a mishmash of different experiences – some that some people will never experience and maybe never even want to. Yes my life is a mosaic of experiences and I guess that sounds good on the surface. But the reason I’ve had so many experiences is that I am so easily distracted from what I think or thought was my actual dream of what I wanted to be when I grew up.
The problem is this. I never grew up. Again, that sounds romantic and maybe even cool to some. But, believe me. It is not. We need to grow up. Does that mean we should lose child-like wonder? Does that mean we should stop living in the moment? Does that mean we should give up on any of our dreams? Does that mean we should lose our ability to be playful and to be silly? Absolutely not. We can still maintain those things. But in the midst of it all, we need to grow up. I need to grow up. It may be too late for that now for me. It is actually hard to teach an old dog new tricks. Is it impossible? Not for some maybe. And, for some, it will never happen.
Something I tell young people now who have dreams of doing things like becoming a singer/songwriter or making a living with their art, etc. I always say, “YES! Follow those dreams!!!” In the meantime, while following those dreams, take business classes. Sound boring? For a creative type it does sound boring. But, it is a NECESSITY to be successful in your creative field of choice. Now, some people have a natural business sense on how to deal with money and business deals, etc. My boyfriend happens to be one of those people. But, the majority of us are not born with that skill and knowledge. We must take business classes to know how to run a business. Because believe me, if you are a singer, a songwriter, a writer, an artist, a craftsman, etc. you are your business and you have to know how to run that business. Don’t think you’ll be able to hire an assistant or a bookkeeper or a marketing person when you are starting out. It will be all you. You will be responsible for knowing a lot of things that someday if you are successful, you may hire other people to be responsible for. But in the beginning and maybe forever, YOU will have to have that knowledge. All of the “successful” artists I know, have a business sense – either natural or learned. They know how to market themselves. They know how to manage their money. They know what taxes they need to pay and when. They know they have to live very simply in the beginning times – if not forever. And, they have to understand that they may never be “famous”. Doing your art (whatever kind it is: singing, writing, painting, etc.) should be because it makes you happy and you enjoy it. If you somehow find yourself famous one day? That is the huge bonus. Well, maybe it is. If you can handle what fame brings. Some people cannot handle it. Some people seem to thrive on it. Some people just deal with it knowing it is just the price of being famous – to deal with what comes with that.
I’ll stop now. Maybe in another post, I’ll describe the things my brain has led me to do and how it has distracted me from what I thought was my actual path. I don’t stay on paths very well. Various other trails beckon me and I just go with it. I just go and hope that I don’t get lost along the way and can never find my way back home. That’s another post. What IS home?